Oh How I Love Bas Bleu!

Confession time: I love information. I like knowing things. And I love books, because they give me information. And that, my dears, is why I PPH Bas Bleu.

What’s that you say? What is a Bas Bleu? Bas bleu (baa blue) is French for blue stocking. And a bluestocking is a literary woman. What this lovely little site does is sell books. Odd little books. Quirky little books. Interesting little books, both fiction and non-fiction. Most of these books you probably have never heard of, but if you read them you’ll be damn glad you did. I get this catalog at my house every holiday season and I always make a nice l “I need to read this” list.

My Bas Bleu Wish List 2011

• Who Put The Devil In Deviled Eggs? The Fascinating Stories Behind America’s Favorite Foods
• Signing Their Lives Away
• Deadly Dictionaries
• How To Write A Sentence And How To Read One
• The Bible: A Biography
• The Thinker’s Thesaurus

In addition to books, they have some great gift ideas that will work for anyone in your life: paint your own watercolor postcard kits, Roman numeral candles, uncommon sticky notes and even toys and books for kids. There is something about this site that just makes me very happy. I think it’s a wonderful destination for the woman who wants something more than what the big box stores offer. I dare you to poke around and not find something you’d love have for your very own.

You can also join the Bas Bleu Society for $30 a year and get free shipping, 15% off most regular-priced items, discounted gift wrap and special offers via e-mail. Oh, and a nifty little membership card.

Oh, come on. You know you want one.

Featured photo credit

Posted by Megan G. for Buy-Her.com.

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Friday Find: Vintage Vinyl Journals

I have a THING for paper products, specifically notebooks and journals. I can’t make it out of my local Staples without slowing down in the fancy notebook aisle. Whether spiral or perfect bound, give me a notebook with a nice cover and some good, weighty paper and I’m in love. So imagine my joy when I received an e-mail from Vintage Vinyl Journals introducing themselves.

Dare I ask for a sample?

I did and they were gracious enough to oblige me. And when it arrived I died, went to Heaven and came back again. Not only was it beautifully bound and full of heavyweight paper, there was something very special about this journal. The front cover was Janet Jackson’s “Control” album and the back was art from the album cover.

A genuine vinyl record on the front...

Yes, you read that right. There was a record on the front of my journal. That’s what Vintage Vinyl Journals are all about. They take old-school vinyl record albums and repurpose them into journals. Not only is that a clever way to keep vintage records out of the landfill, it makes a great gift for someone old enough to appreciate the distinctive pop and hiss of music embedded in vinyl.

The journals are well-made and sturdy and contain 240 pages of unlined, acid-free paper with a sewn-in bookmark. You can choose from a variety of genres, from classics like Bing Crosby to legends like the Beatles and Led Zeppelin to newer artists like Taylor Swift. They’ll even make a custom journal for you, often at no extra charge (depending on how hard the album is to find – if you’re looking for Al Jolson, you’ll probably have to pay a premium).

...and album cover art on the back

These books make a great gift for just about anyone, but for music lovers in particular. And they work even if the recipient isn’t a journaler. I’m not a fan of writing on unlined paper, so I’ve been using my journal as an inspiration book for home decor projects (I’m always on the hunt and love to pull pictures of things I like) so my ideas are all in one place. Other uses I thought of:

° Scrapbook— grab one with an album from the year someone’s child was born and fill it with pictures and mementos.
° Birthday gift for an old friend—choose a record from your high school years (or however far back you go) and paste pictures and memorabilia from that time inside.
°Concert tickets – this would be a great way to document all the fun you had (if you’re one who saves these things).

The possibilities are just about endless!

Disclaimer: As I said, Vintage Vinyl Journals was kind enough to give me a journal to use. It was my choice to write about it because this is exactly the kind of thing that makes me indescribably happy. I hope it will make you happy too.

Posted by Megan G. for Buy-Her.com.

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The Digital Mom Handbook

I have to tell you about a book I waited four months for.  The Digital Mom Handbook: How to Blog, Vlog, Tweet, and Facebook Your Way to a Dream Career at Home.

Never have I ever thought to pre-order a book.  My birthday was in March and The Digital Mom Handbook went right on my list when I heard about the pre-order.  My sister was cool enough to get it for me.  Tuesday night when the boys and I got home I was beyond excited to find it waiting in my door.  I perused the pages a bit before bed with every intent to start reading it in the morning.

Can I just say, not since the Twilight series have I been so excited to crack open a book?  (That should tell you something right there.)  It tends to take me weeks to get through a book with all the chaos at home.  Only the Twilight books did I read in a few hours over a few days.  Could not put it down.  Though totally different subject matter, The Digital Mom Handbook was the same way for me.  It took me the whole entire morning but I did not put it down once, and I dog eared several pages along the way so I could go back over them later.

This book more than spoke to me, it inspired me.  It discusses finding your passion, how to begin and what to do along the way.  It was written by Audrey McClelland of Momgenerations and Colleen Padilla of Classymommy.  They broke down everything into 7 basic steps… even including smaller things along the way, such as how to set up a Twitter or You Tube account in case you are new to that aspect of social media.  While I had already done several of the things they suggested, there were some I had overlooked.

What I loved most was reading Colleen and Audrey’s stories about how they got where they are, along with excerpts from many other bloggers.  The further in I read, the more excited I felt myself becoming.  For so many years I did not know what I wanted career wise.  It was only a little more than a year ago that I really realized this was it… but part of me wondered if I was too late to the game.  The Digital Mom Handbook made me feel like it’s not too late, that there is really room for all of us.

I should also tell you that I happen to know Audrey McClelland personally.  I nervously introduced myself to her at Style Week Providence last January.  She was incredibly nice.  The Digital Mom Handbook talks about finding a mentor.  I can say that for me, Audrey is that person.  When she barely knew me she emailed me the answers to my blogging questions when I didn’t know who else to ask.  She is beyond wonderful and I hope to have a career like her at some point.

If trying to get a career from blogging is something you are thinking about, this book is definitely for you.  Even if you just want a small crash course in all things social media, this is for you too.  The Digital Mom Handbook retails for $15.99 and can even be found for as low as $10.10 on Amazon.

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When Did I Get Like This? By Amy Wilson

You cruise along in your life, making decisions, getting things done, kicking life’s ass. And then one day you find yourself in a full-on panic because Chuck E. Cheese’s is booked on the day you planned your son’s birthday party and you don’t quite understand why you care so much. Amy Wilson‘s memoir, When Did I Get Like This? asks the very question that will inevitably go through your mind more times than you’ll care to admit once you’ve given birth. Or even thought that maybe it would fun to have a baby. Possibly.

For me it began when, after getting pregnant with scientific precision, I had a miscarriage. For Amy it began when she couldn’t accomplish what seems like a natural, easy thing: actually getting pregnant. Nothing makes you feel more like a failure than being unable to accomplish something 15-year-olds manage by accident in the back of some senior’s Mustang on a boring Saturday night. Except maybe actually having that baby.

I immediately bonded with Amy when I discovered she had the same distaste (pun intended) for What To Expect When You’re Expecting‘s now-defunct Best Odds Diet as I did. All through this book I found myself nodding my head along with her, from breastfeeding hysteria to knowing that something’s wrong with your child and everyone thinking you’re nuts to doing a really good job on something and having it go completely unnoticed and unremarked on (This, I believe, is the essence of motherhood: No one notices when you’re doing it right, but one bad moment and the whole world’s judging you).

The book is totally relatable; I can’t imagine a contemporary mother who hasn’t questioned both her maternal skills and her sanity after being assaulted with as much information and pressure to be “perfect” as we are subjected to on a daily basis. It’s about questioning every decision you make regarding your children and wondering frequently how in the hell your mother managed to get through your entire childhood without a stack of parenting books by her side (Hint: it’s because she didn’t have a stack of parenting books by her side). It’s about wanting to do what’s best for your kids and never really being sure exactly what that is. It’s the recognition that insanity has become the new sanity and none of us seems to be immune.

But what saves Amy, I think, is her sense of humor, her ability to see the insanity and identify it even while indulging in it. It’s the only sane thing to do, really.

Knowing you’re not alone is half the battle. If you’re a mom, go get this book. If you want to be a mom, go get this book.

You won’t be sorry.

Posted by Megan G. for Buy-Her.com.

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A Damn Good Workout

I’ve been exercising for like 150 years. OK, maybe it isn’t quite that long, but it feels like it. Why? Because I get bored. Lift weights, hit treadmill, blah, blah, blah. Meh. So over it. What I am not over is how exercise makes me feel – lean, strong and healthy. I recently set out to find a new exercise program that would give me a good workout but be different what I’ve been doing. Enter Rodney Yee’s Power Yoga Total Body.

This is not for wimps. I only recommend it if you have a some yoga experience under your belt. It’s done in a flow style, where one pose flows into the next. Rodney calls the poses by their names, so if you don’t know Warrior One from Downward Dog you’re going to be lost. Even if you are an experienced yogi, this is a challenging workout. It’s meant to help you gain strength as well as flexibility. You will sweat. You will curse Rodney repeatedly (or maybe that’s just me). But in the end you will be damn glad you plunked down the $8.99 plus shipping for this baby. Like I said, I’m an experienced yogi/exerciser and this is challenging for me.

The workout is 60 minutes – that’s one hour of almost constant movement. The pace is quick, not relaxed like you may have experienced with other yoga workouts. This is not for relaxation and centering, it’s for toning and conditioning your body.

I like Rodney Yee as a yoga instructor. Sometimes I giggle at him, but it’s in the privacy of my own home, so it doesn’t count (does it?). Other instructors  irritate me because they talk too much or too slowly or whatever, but I think Rodney gets it about right.

If you’re looking for a new challenge or just want to add new dimension to your workouts, try this video. It’s under $10 and since you do it at home, no one can see you when you can’t get your head off of the floor in Reverse Bow.

Namaste indeed.

Oh! Look what I found at Target! Why did no one tell me about this before?!

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Oscar Buzz: Which Flicks Will Win?

It’s no surprise this weekend is Oscar weekend. Some people love the hype and the show. Some people could care less. Me? Well, obviously I love the hype.  And the fashion.  For the 1st time ever, this year I actually tried to watch all movies with major nominations before this weekend.

Long story short, I am going to fail. But, I tried. And there were TWO snow storms earlier this month which left my children out of school for 9 days. That really cut into my movie watching.

Anyway, back to the matter at hand which is reviewing. I mean this site is called Buy-Her and all.  I’ll tell you my thoughts on what movie tickets you should buy,what you should pay to rent if it’s already on DVD, or what is just not worth it.

First off, The King’s Speech is a must. I went to this even though I did NOT think I would like it. I didn’t really know what it was about and was thinking it might be a bit Sense and Sensibility or some other such thing. Well, my friends, it was splendid. Based on a true story I had no idea even existed.  Plus, I am a bit partial to the Royals. The Queen and I share a china pattern.

Next must, Black Swan. Admittedly, I danced ballet for many years of my life. Ye ‘ol Pioneer Woman, Ree and I danced in the same studio and productions. That’s a little fun fact for you. Anyway- it was stunning.  And I am certain I would still think so even if I never ever even danced ballet myself. Natalie is certain to win. She did some serious work for that role and acted it perfectly. The word perfect is VERY important in this movie or else you will not get it. It is a definite must see. It’s beautiful.

I also saw Blue Valentine. Bleh. Boo. Yuck. I hated it. Michelle Williams (best actress nom) and Ryan Gosling did a great job getting the roles right- but I hated the movie. It’s a take it or leave it. Also, it’s depressing.

That brings us to another seriously depressing one: The Rabbit Hole with Nicole Kidman (best actress nom). Maybe it wasn’t such a grand idea to see it during the 1st anniversary period of my mother’s death…as I totally related to the whole thing about grief a little too much. I cried and cried. Nicole is wonderful, but I am sure Natalie will beat her. This movie is very good for people dealing with grief. It made me feel a little normal. I think it’s one you should see, but know you will not feel all sunshine and butterflies after.

Toy Story 3. Surely that’s a given, right? Also, I cried in it too.

The Kids are Alright…the movie was alright. I really didn’t think it was that great. I am not sure why it has a best picture nomination. It’s a meh. Annette Bening  is also nominated as best actress, but I don’t really get that either. Sorry Annette.

127 hours. WOW. You must have a strong stomach, or spend the movie closing your eyes a lot. It was very good, and if James Franco didn’t happen to be up against Colin Firth in King’s Speech, then he might take the Oscar home.

The Social Network: Everyone should see it. It’s a very interesting take on the history of social media. Well done, good acting.  Jesse is kind of in the same boat as James, though. Too bad Colin will beat them out.

Inception, The Fighter, True Grit, Winter Bone are the best picture nominees I haven’t gotten to yet.  I’ve also not seen Biutiful, in which Javier Bardem is nominated as best actor. It’s not on anywhere here, probably because I live in mid-America. I also missed The Town which has a supporting actor nominee.

Here’s a complete recap of who and what are up for what. My picks for winners are in RED, just in case you’re wondering. (And, yes, for those random categories at the end, I totally just went with a gut feeling, as I have absolutely nothing to base any choice on whatsoever.)

Posted by AJSouthern for Buy-Her.com.

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Going Gray By Anne Kreamer

After over twenty years of coloring my hair every shade except blue or chartreuse, I let my natural gray grow in during 2007 so it was with intense interest that I read Anne Kreamer’s Going Gray, What I Learned about Beauty, Sex, Work, Motherhood, Authenticity, and Everything Else That Matters. Kreamer did the heavy lifting for research slackers like me. While I was content to just go gray and not worry about it except that my hair looked ridiculous for many months, Kreamer, a former television executive, did a cultural study of what it means to go gray in these youth-obsessed United States. Her book covers the cultural aspects of hair color from the romantic to the professional.

As Kreamer made the transition to her natural gray (she has a gorgeous gray, I might add), she did several things to establish what it means for Americans to drop the facade of youth, at least when it comes to hair color.

For example, she surveyed people to determine reactions to gray hair regarding age estimation, appearance, attraction and other assumptions we make about people based on their looks. To test the effects of hair color, gray in particular, on one’s ability to attract a date, she joined an online dating website. To further test this, she went bar hopping with the intention of learning how men would react to her with a brunette wig and then with her natural gray. To learn how gray hair is perceived in the professional realm, Kreamer interviewed image consultants, headhunters and people strongly tied to the entertainment industry where going gray is one of the riskiest things a woman can do, probably a close second to gaining weight in terms of riskiness.

I really didn’t think about it much when I decided to go gray (without the help of a colorist, by the way). Like so many thing in my life, I made the decision and dove right in without knowing all the ramifications of my decision. On my resume that’s called action-oriented. My mother would call it impulsive. And she doesn’t make it sound very nice either. But back to my hair. I got tired of doing the roots all the time. It was expensive and time consuming. Why fight it?

As a society, we perceive female gray or white hair negatively whereas for men, it can have positive connotations even if it’s as simple as one guy muttering to another Hey, at least you still have hair to turn gray.

Kreamer writes about her findings in a fun, conversational style that makes for a quick read. I must admit that I was a little annoyed at how New York-centric it was, but then that’s where the tastemakers, the influencers, the people with the power, resources and reach to establish how we see ourselves and how we measure beauty live and work so it makes perfect sense, doesn’t it?

Regionally, there are differences in how women are expected to “keep themselves up.” What I can get away with here in Georgia would cause me to be banished from society, not just polite society, but all society, in L.A. In fact, I might be jailed for the way I look in L.A. And have you been to Texas? Yeah? So you know.

Kreamer does the math to show how much American women spend coloring their hair and how they rank it as a spending priority. I won’t give away any secrets, but holy peroxide, that’s a lot of cheddar for Ash Blond Fantasy, Chestnut Dreams and Mahogany Is Too My Natural Color, You Jerk. Allowing for economic situational differences, Kreamer finds that women of all financial stratas spend approximately the same percentage of their income on hair color.

Interesting. I wonder how this deep and long recession has affected that statistic. (Kreamer’s book was published in 2007 when the recession began.) I know that had I not already gone gray, a year of unemployment would likely have driven me to it as our family cut back on discretionary spending. My roots already had a way of knowing when money was tight.

So while I missed the boat on cashing in on a book about what it was like to go completely gray at the age of forty-one, at least I can tell you that this book is a must read for anyone considering no longer being a slave to their roots.

Posted by Lisahgolden for Buy-Her.com.

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Half In Love

I suppose I should start this off with a bit of a disclaimer. This book, Half in Love (surviving the legacy of suicide) may not be for everyone. It is the story of a woman whose mother committed suicide, and who herself then went on to make several attempts on her own life.  However, as an admitted English geek (did you catch the reference in the title?) and lover of dark, realistic portrayals of life, this memoir by Linda Gray Sexton (yes! Anne Sexton’s daughter!) was something I knew I wanted to read immediately.

As someone who has struggled with depression for most of my life, reading Linda’s story was often painful and unsettling. In fact, I frequently found myself empathizing so much with her experience that I worried I was being pulled back in to a dark spiral. So much of her story and situation resonated with me, and in the end, I realized I was simply reliving my own pain in reading hers.

The story begins with the legacy itself.  Anne Sexton committed suicide when Linda was a senior at Harvard, and came after a lifetime of attempts and hospitalizations. Linda shares wrenching stories of being sent off to various relatives while her mother was ill and how this stained her childhood. Later, as she became old enough to care for herself, she was not sent off, but remained home to care for her mother. Linda wanted nothing more than this, and it established a dangerous codependent relationship between the mother and daughter. As a teenager, she began to pull away in superficial ways, but their bond was unshakable.

Once Anne died, Linda blindly moves forward with her life, still connected to her mother as executor of her posthumously published work.  But in that moment, there was nothing to fear. She could simply create the type of life for herself that she always saw in her mind, one that contrasted with her mother’s pain and shortcomings:

I thought I could pick the sort of mother I would be, as simply as I might pluck events or holidays from a river of experience. I thought I could consciously choose the foundation on which I would build the style of my mothering. I’d thought that decisiveness and self-control were the ways we shaped our futures; if those futures were handed down from generation to generation, then to succeed at changing them was still within reach with the application of a little bit of effort. It didn’t occur to me then that there was some secret code in both learned behavior and genetic, biological expression that was embedded with us. I could not see that these two factors might actually govern what I did, and what kind of mother I would be, regardless of how I strove to aim at a particular vision of myself in this role. I began to discover, slowly, that it was not a question of pure willpower.

However, Linda’s life is soon firmly in the grips of her previously undiagnosed bipolar disorder, and she wakes one day to find herself in an institution after having cut herself and taken pills in a bathtub while her children slept in the other room. The rest of the story catalogs two more attempts, the dissolution of her marriage, and the ultimate ascent from her downward spiral. Her story, this legacy of suicide, is completely heartbreaking, but it is also deeply woven with hope, love, and strength.

Do you know a girl that hates depressing stories? Yeah, DON”T buy her this book. Otherwise, you can find Linda Gray Sexton’s memoir at Amazon for just over $16.00

Feature image by taivasalla on Flickr

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Why My Third Husband Will Be A Dog

I was at our local library Saturday using their internet and looking for something to read when I checked out the New Releases shelf and saw “Why My Third Husband Will Be a Dog.”  That title? Totally caught my eye.  So I did what I always do before checking out a book, I checked out the back.

Lisa?  Writes like a blogger.

Why?  Because she writes a humor column for the Philadelphia Inquirer.

She also writes bestselling mystery novels.  And by bestselling?  I mean New York Times Bestsellers.

I fell in love with Lisa just from the introduction of this book alone.   Her mystery novels all have women, amazing ordinary women, as main characters.  When asked if she would ever write a man as a main character she answered “No.”  When asked why not, she answered “Because I have ovaries. I write what I know. “  Love her.

Lisa has been twice divorced (like me!!!) and has been beyond broke when first divorced (also? Like me!  We could be BFF’s. Or Twinsies!) In fact her life sounds a lot like yours “if you crave carbs, can’t find jeans that fit, and still believe these two things are unrelated.”  She has an great sense of humor, wit and wisdom.

She writes about amazing adventures of everyday lives.  Such topics as “Of Dogs and Men” where she explores the connection between the number of divorces a woman has in relation to the number of dogs she currently shares her bed with.  “Family Fun” where she tells us the life lessons she has learned from having her mother Mother Mary, and her gay brother Brother Frank visit for a week.  Such gems as “You can’t chloroform your mother” especially if your brother is around.  She writes about raising her only daughter on her own, and living with 4 dogs, 2 kittens, 14 chickens and hot flashes.

I sat down and read this book cover to cover, only coming up for dinner and sleep.  It’s a quick easy light-hearted read that woman of all ages can relate to and get a laugh out of.  She’s honest, and funny and writes what we’re all thinking but just don’t have the nerves or the place to say.

Whether you read her book, or just her column, please check out Lisa Scottoline.  She’s a woman’s woman with a great sense of humor.  You will be nodding your head in agreement and laughing along with her.

Feature photo by: April Narby

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Change Your Mind aAnd Your Life Will Follow

Christmas 2010 was a Christmas I’m not likely to forget anytime soon.  It was definitely one for the record books.  It was that Christmas that I kept a promise to my daughters and bought them the laptops they were promised the year before.  Being able to do that brought great joy to me.  And to them, clearly.

But what made my Christmas 2010 so memorable is that the day after, my boyfriend decided he was ‘just done’ and ended our 4 year relationship.  With a  simple seven- word text message.  Classy.

But this isn’t about him.

This is about me.  And my reaction to the break-up.

Actually it’s about a book that has been a tremendous help.  Not just dealing with my break-up, but with life in general.

Change Your Mind and Your Life Will Follow

I have spent way more time than I care to admit wishing that my ex could have been, or even could still be, the man I wanted him to be.  I wanted him to change, to be the man I thought he was.  I could be so much happier if he would just see things MY way, change his mind and come back.

Except that ain’t gonna happen.

Nearly 30 years ago, Karen Casey went into a meeting with the same expectations.  She went to this meeting hoping to find out exactly what needed to be done to get the people in her life to change so that she could be happy.

What she found out, and what I am learning, is that really, the only person we can change?  Is ourselves.

And Ohhhh doesn’t that just cramp our style, because nothing is wrong with us, clearly.  They are the problem.  If they would just do this, or stay away from that, our lives would be so much easier and happier.

Karen Casey came away from that first meeting with knowledge and a change so profound she has spent years teaching others about it.

This book is organized around 12 very simple steps making small changes every single day.  Small steps such as

• Tend your own garden
• Stop focusing on problems so their solutions can emerge
• Let go of outcomes
• Change your mind
• Choose to act rather than react
• Give up your judgments
• Remember that you are not in control
• Discover your own lessons
• Do No Harm
• Quiet your mind
• Every encounter is a Holy encounter – respond accordingly  (this book is based loosely around the 12 step program, there is no religious affiliate, here, she uses Holy as in your own higher power)
• There are two voices in your mind – one is always wrong

“This book gives us the tools we need to find within ourselves the positive, peaceful response to every curve life throws at us.”

Reading this book hasn’t healed my broken heart.  Sadly, only time is going to do that.  But, reading this book has helped me make some small yet meaningful changes in my life, in my way of thinking and acting and reacting to situations, that lead me to believe it won’t take much time and I’ll be fine.

I was so moved by this book when I originally read it years ago, going through my divorce, that I immediately sought it out on my bookshelf to read again.  Not being able to find it at the time, I bought a new copy, only to come home and find my original book on a different bookshelf than were I had been looking.  So, I will give away my brand new never been read copy of Change Your Mind and Your Life Will Follow. Leave me a comment, and Friday I will come up with some fun creative way to pick a random comment as the winner.

If you don’t win the give away, you can buy your own copy here.

***ETA:  Sorry I’m a little late picking a winner.  But as they say? Better late than never.  Because my creativity up and disappeared, I went to Random.org and had them pick a random winner for me.

Chibi Jeebs! You will be receiving your free copy of “Change Your Mind and Your Life Will Follow”.  Congratulations!!!!

Posted by Becky Hood (Ms Batman) for Buy-Her.com.

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